My name is Whitney. I stand 5’3 on a “Tall Day” and weigh in at…a healthy weight. I am not large in size, but I’m pretty feisty. If you know me, you likely think I’m sweet, considerate and very “non-scary".
While I’m a big advocate of the campaign my kids started in my honor, called “Crazy Beats Big Any Day”, I never really thought I was all THAT terrifying.
But, if I’m being 100% honest with myself, I guess I should acknowledge…
Yes…
I have been very known for getting more than a little loud at the ball field on occasion. (What?!)
And…
HEAVEN FORBID anyone try to “come between me and MY man” (Spoken in my annoying Big Brother Rachel voice).
But, today someone I love deeply told me it was often hard to tell me the truth, because I made them feel afraid.
Afraid…
Of me.
Of what I would think.
Of what I would do.
Of what I would say.
It was in that moment, I realized I need to give people a little more slack. I always say if you don’t want to be disappointed, don’t expect too much from anyone.
But, the truth is, I expect a lot from everyone in my life. Not just “a lot”. A LOT.
My expectations for myself, for those I love and for those I choose to let in my life are great. In fact, they are most often so unreasonable, there is no one who could ever fulfill them to meet my standards. I preach the value of character authenticity, but then I am quick to cast judgment on it when it’s revealed.
I suppose you don’t have to be 7 feet tall and weigh 500 pounds to be terrifying. No, you can be 5’3, weigh a buck thirty five and still have the power to cause such immense fear that you’re unable to be given the truth.
I’ve decided I don’t want to be “scary” anymore.
So, to those who deserve it…I’m sorry. <3
Whitney
